Created in Canva
number sevenJUNE 2026 talk angryb e g o o d o r b e c a r e f u l
Thank you to: springtime for color and moisture every good thing in this world despite (or in retaliation of?) the absolute worst shit imaginable happening along side it people who give solid, earnest compliments summertime for warmth and play and fruit clean water, cool breezes, tomorrow night
There's no better time to get back on track; What we do today will make an impact.JUNE IN PHOTOSconorbaseball sznshorebird“idiot picnic”long shadowsbuzzin’
b o o k s , m o v i e s e t c . Martyr! is pretty good so far; it took me a second to get into, though. Social media has ruined my attention span, so I think that’s just going to be the case from now until I hang my phone up forever. I’d wanted to watch Pillion since I saw the preview for it a few months ago or so, but I thought it was going to be more of a dark comedy instead of, just like, mostly sad the entire time. It was a very good portrayal of being in a shitty relationship under the guise of consent and care--which, like, made it murkier because that’s sort of what Colin signed up for, but holy FUCK--was his aptitude for devotion something he genuinely enjoyed? Or did he seek out another sub/dom relationship because that’s what he knew? Is the whole thing about what happens when you don’t advocate for yourself? Repeating patterns? Or was that what he wanted the whole time? Idk, idk. I want to read the book. In case it hasn’t been abundantly clear yet, I’ve been listening to Bright Eyes again a lot & was humming along to “it was Don Delillo, whiskey-- neat, and a blinking midnight clock” and thought, like, yeah you know what? It IS time to read White Noise again. So I bought it on Thrift Books and it came, today, with a notecard from the previous owner to himself (I know it’s a man because the handwriting tells me so): meditate 2x Day for 10 min, Help create will power, focus on reality, the now, not emotion, help wake up & sleep better. Solid advice; I wonder if they followed it.
7 WE DON’T TALK – HILARY DUFF 2 PLAY DESTROY – POPPY FEAT. GRIMES 3 MANY TIMES – DIJON 5 RENAISSANCE GIRLS – OH LAND 4 FEARS – LIME GARDEN6 LOST BOYS – PHOEBE BRIDGERS 9 MOONGIRL – STELLASTARR* 8 ISLANDS – THE XX 1 V V V (THEY LIE) – PANTAYO oh it’s summer: 10 I WANNA FUCK YOU TIL YOU’RE DEAD – YACHT go on walks, listen to tunes
A corner of my room: crewel ship, editor’s note from LA mag about Joan and Eve dying within a few weeks of each other, Sparta’s setlist, mirror I found at DI that would have haunted me if I didn’t purchase, abalone shell from a thrift store in Joshua Tree, sparkly unicorn, tile from the tile house in Venice with a quote from Ever After, glass bowl from my oma with matches from all over, cheer patch from Hollywood High School, custom Weetzie Bat heart patch from Tuesday Bassen
a mercurial blonde brat sweetly slurring lazuli blue lullabys swaying--pleading--at the threshold of your inner world late nights, younger years what sound does a ghost make? you made snow angels in the ashes from The Tower after it fell. And laughed. celestial murmurs from an apparition materializing in the hall (or a skeleton costume in the closet?) deafening, definitely gonna happen And you whispered across the ether that nothing matters until your mid-summer, late afternoon daydream blooms, bears fruit. Everything else was practice. crooked mouth, owl eyes, a hand-held mirror wink! faint recognition of a song you’ve never heard can I ask you a question? echoing back for eternity yes
JUNE PLEASURE LIST impromptu trips eye contact perambulating networking, but as friendship a playlist I made for Paulina to get her into good country full weekends, lazy weekends, whatever dinner & drinkies on our patio daydreaming, writing it down
JUNE GLOOM
I’ve been putting my phone in a house: a napkin holder affixed to the wall in the hallway so it makes it harder for me to mindlessly scroll and easier to find something else to do. I also (don’t know why I didn’t do this earlier) put my notes app on my home screen so I can MAKE A NOTE instead of fucking around on social media until I remember what I was initially trying to do.
outfit details: rubber chicken hairclip appreciation selfie, I keep wearing this top backward coz I like the low back I Y K Y K
I haven’t really been remembering my dreams lately, but today I woke up and felt sort of floaty and hopeful. Probably a pretty decent night of dreaming, I think! Little lightning bug flickers of memories of dreams from the last month: -at the Hollywood Bowl, getting super close and then far away, like the tide -Trying to get to work, ended up putting on an art show--mostly photography, some tiny paintings. Broken wine glasses -Made some shirts & I can’t remember what they said but I think they were funny -Anne Geddes babies -the moon -sometimes when I meditate I plop myself in a dusky field with daisies and wildflowers; I’ve been dreaming about that place
Paulina and I were planning on our bi-monthly-sometimes- weekly snacks and drinks and journaling Friday night, and that is what happened, with a little caveat of “well, Bright Eyes is playing a show in New York tomorrow and I kind of want to go.” Everything happened so fast after that; It was all so easy. I bought a GA ticket for the show, and plane and hotel on Expedia. It was a United flight, so I wouldn’t be getting sky miles, but I didn’t mind. The hotel was in midtown, an area I’ve been fortunate enough to familiarize myself with recently. That day, I’d been mulling it over at work; looking at flights and hotels and figuring out logistics. I asked my most responsible and grounded friends and colleagues for advice. Everyone said I should go. If I’m meant to go, I’ll see polka dots. When I was getting my nails done, Tia offered, unprompted, “we should do yellow polka dots next time.” Did I see them? No, but I heard the words and that felt more real. I had a window seat on the way there, and an empty middle seat! Landed in Newark, Uber Shuttled to Midtown, dropped my bags off, headed to the park to assess what next. My brain was still trying to catch up with my body, all that forward motion made me dizzy and so tired (truthfully, I have no idea how long I was asleep, but when I landed there, I was fully under the canopy of trees and when I woke up my legs were tingly from the sun. That could have been what woke me up). ANOTHER TRAVELIN' SONG
Morning onigiri was calling to me, so I found a little Japanese market and bought some salmon and spicy tuna, along with an unsweetened matcha to dissipate the fog. It worked for a little bit, but my phone was dying, so I went back to the hotel to charge & was hoping for an early “you can check in now” text. That text never came, but they had free bottles of water and were so sweet to a scroungy, scattered, lobby-sitter. After some air conditioning and water, I thought to check my list of places that have matchbooks--a bar a few blocks away was on that list and even though it was only noon, the goal was matchbooks for my collection, not drinking. The only other person in the establishment was the bartender (and I think some folks in the kitchen but none that I could see) so I sat at the bar. Two gin & tonics and about an entire pitcher of lemon water and a winding conversation with my Colombian bartender about living in NYC and the state of the world and being a decent human being flowed effortlessly through me. He gave me a discount on the one drink he charged me for. I asked about the matches as I was about to leave, but they were out. I was kinda hungry, and was privy to the free hot dog per pint of draft beer at Rudy’s. What an absolute deal, oh my god. Another good bit of chit-chat and a wander and then back to the hotel to check in, finally. Showered, dressed, added coppery shimmer. Rode the subway to Queens & followed everyone else up a hill to the venue. Somehow (a fucking lucky girl, ugh) I stood a row back from barricade. I made show friends with the folks around me and we all gushed about what we were about to witness. We shared sunscreen and stories and sips from water bottles.
Even though I’d just bore witness to the same show two weeks earlier, the air was worlds away--instead of stardust and moonbeam silvery-pink glitter, the atmosphere was golden sun and infinite inner-child giggling. The show starts with a slightly-different-and-a-little-updated- for-the-times version of “...so there was this woman, and she was on an airplane” and I couldn’t stop smiling or singing along or succumbing to the shimmering ocean of every living thing around me. I fucking love the pit (when I can see, breathe, and around kind people who remind me that community is in everyday interactions) so much. I carry the electricity of seeing and hearing and feeling live music--that close up--in the saggital band, in the central slip. And then, as we were waiting to hear Built to Spill between Wide Awake and Digital Ash, a lurid announcement on the screens on each side of the stage declared: DUE TO APPROACHING LIGHTNING AND HIGH WINDS, THE REMAINDER OF THIS EVENING’S SHOW HAS BEEN CANCELLED. FOR YOUR SAFETY, PLEASE CALMLY EVACUATE THE VENUE. .............................oh, okay. Headphones in, Digital Ash on to either salt or soothe the wound, I took the F to the East Village and wandered around in the thunder and the rain for a long, long time. A well-dressed twenty-something asked if I could take his picture with a disposable camera for his sister, a doorman and I chatted about the lobby of the residential building that has been virtually untouched since 1956, I asked a hostess of a posh restaurant if I could use their restroom. And in between all of that I cried a lot. Earth’s flash-flood obscured the salty warmth and the filthy wet. Did everything go as planned? No, but does it ever?
“lunch” walks (NYC edition part 2)
seeing stars
currently inspired by: Dressing for my Venus sign! I know a handful of my readers will roll their eyes about astrology, and that’s fine. It’s fun! Who cares? I’ve been seeing some discourse online about dressing for your Venus sign so I wanted to try it. The fabrics, colors, and textures suggested for Venus in Pisces are already on heavy rotation in my closet and am like a moth-to-a-flame about them in thrift stores, so I wanna be more intentional with how I style day-to- day. Flowy, velvet, silk, dreamlike, ethereal. Light colors, shimmer, metallic. Celestial locations don’t have to tell me to embody the fairy-ness of it all, but I appreciate the confirmation. I MADE A LITTLE COLLAGE ABOUT IT
I N T E R N E T I N S P I R A T I O N
THE FIVE SENSES OF JUNETASTE: Lots of blackberries, blueberries, and other fruit lately. Caroline made strawberry shortcakes for Mara’s Birthday Sandlot and it was so good, ugh. TOUCH: I can’t remember most of my dreams lately, but I can recall textures like running my hands over a field of daisies or scratchy tongue from eating pineapple. SMELL: Every time I wear Thin Wild Mercury’s Laurel Canyon, I get at least a couple compliments on it. Top: Sweet Orange, Herbal Terpenes, Grapefruit Middle: Italian Cannabis, Petitgrain, Clove, Jasmine Sambac Base: Ambergris, Birch Tar, Patchouli HEAR: I bought a ticket to see Phoebe Bridgers at the Delta Center in October, and have been listening to her quite a bit. She’s sad & stellar at getting it out on paper. SEE: I’ve been seeing really good color combinations in nature lately. Cornflower and pale peach shadow and light in the late day. Darkroom red and neon navy blue. Terracotta and lavender.
@talkangry