The Village you're not doing this alone. Love hard. Love deep. ♡ — AC H A O S T O C O N T R O L C O . · A C H A O S M I N I B O O KReal stories about the village we lose, the village we find, and the one we build on purpose — from a mom who's still in it too.
B E F O R E W E S T A R T Real talk for a second. This little book isn't about having it all together. It's about the part of motherhood nobody warns you about — that somewhere along the way, the circle gets quiet, and you find yourself carrying too much, alone. I've been there. I AM there. What's in here is the real stuff: the village I lost, the calls that changed everything, and the people I learned to let in. I've lived every page. Read it slow. Take what fits, leave what doesn't. And if your list feels small right now — keep going. This whole book is me saying: you're not doing this alone. — Amanda ♡ ★ ✦ ★
P A R T O N E · W H E N T H E V I L L A G E G O T Q U I E T Chapter One I Cried in My Car Not the pretty kind of crying. The ugly, shoulders-shaking, "I can't do this" kind — in a parking lot, engine off, twenty whole minutes to myself. Here's what I learned in that car: the crying wasn't the problem. The crying was the release. I'd been holding it together so tightly, for so long, that my body finally said enough. If your car is where you fall apart — you're not broken. You're a woman who's been carrying too much for too long. And carrying it alone. The crying wasn't the problem. The crying was the release. Real Reminder™ You're not broken. You're carrying too much — and you were never meant to carry it alone. Love hard. Love deep. ♡ — A C H A O S T O C O N T R O L C O . · I T T A K E S A V I L L A G E
Chapter Two The Village Got Smaller My list used to have twenty-plus names on it. The people I thought were my people. Then life started happening — the real kind. The kind that doesn't ask who likes your posts. It asks who shows up. And I started calling. And the list… shrank. I won't tell you to "go find your village." I'll tell you the truth: sometimes the village is small. And small can still be mighty. One good friend. One text thread. One person who answers at 9pm. That counts. Small can still be mighty. Real Reminder™ A small, true village beats a big, fake one. The few who answer at 11pm are your whole village. Love hard. Love deep. ♡ — A C H A O S T O C O N T R O L C O . · I T T A K E S A V I L L A G E
Chapter Three The Friends Who Faded Nobody warns you about this part. You picture forever with a big, warm circle around you — and then, slowly, quietly, people fade. The ones who were around when it was all still easy and fun. I'd have sworn they were forever. Then life got real, and the texts stopped. Not even a text. The village I thought I had wasn't the village I actually had. That hurt — I'm not going to pretend it didn't. But it also got honest. And honest is something you can finally build on. Not even a text. Real Reminder™ Real life is a filter. If your list got smaller, it's not because you're hard to love — the dust just settled. Love hard. Love deep. ♡ — A C H A O S T O C O N T R O L C O . · I T T A K E S A V I L L A G E
Chapter Four It Costs Something to Be the Bigger Person Here's one I sat in for years: it's hard, and it hurts, to be the bigger person. Why? I give my heart to everyone — whether I know you or not. I'll stay longer than you want but need. I'll love harder than you expect. And I spent a long time getting walked all over for it — smiling on the outside while it cost me on the inside. What I know now: loving hard is the gift and the wound. You're allowed to keep your soft heart and finally protect it too. I'll be the best mention you'll never forget. It hurts to be the bigger person. Why? T R U T H Protecting your heart isn't going cold. It's deciding who gets the soft parts of you. Real Reminder™ Loving hard is the gift and the wound. You can keep your soft heart and still protect it. Love hard. Love deep. ♡ — A C H A O S T O C O N T R O L C O . · I T T A K E S A V I L L A G E
P A R T T W O · T H E T W O C A L L S Chapter Five The Call I Needed I needed someone. And it took me twenty minutes before I finally called. Twenty minutes of talking myself out of it, then back into it — not because I had no one, but because saying I need you felt like the hardest thing in the world. I just wanted someone I could reach without overthinking it. Someone who would answer. Someone who would sit in the hard with me and say four words: "I've got you." Real Reminder™ You're not a burden. You're a friend who hasn't called yet. Love hard. Love deep. ♡ — A C H A O S T O C O N T R O L C O . · I T T A K E S A V I L L A G E
Chapter Six The Call I Got Last night, I got a call. Because this time, I was the village. Someone needed me. Everything in me wanted to grab my keys and go. But I couldn't — I'd taken medication and physically couldn't drive. It broke me. I felt helpless. So we stayed on the phone. And afterward, it hit me: we don't need an army. But we do need more than one. Because what happens when your one person is sick? Out of town? Can't get to you? One person cannot carry everything. Motherhood wasn't meant to rest on one set of shoulders. We don't need an army. But we do need more than one. Real Reminder™ You don't need an army. You need more than one. Build your 13. Love hard. Love deep. ♡ — A C H A O S T O C O N T R O L C O . · I T T A K E S A V I L L A G E
P A R T T H R E E · W H O Y O U R P E O P L E R E A L L Y A R E Chapter Seven The Starfish After a storm, thousands of starfish wash up on the beach. A boy is throwing them back, one at a time. A man says, "There are thousands. You can't possibly make a difference." The boy throws another into the sea and says: "I made a difference to that one." That's the whole job some days. You won't fix everything. You won't save everyone. But you will make a difference to that one — the one who answered, the one you answered for. That is enough. That is everything. That is the village. "I made a difference to that one." Real Reminder™ You made a difference to that one. That is enough. That is everything. Love hard. Love deep. ♡ — A C H A O S T O C O N T R O L C O . · I T T A K E S A V I L L A G E
Chapter Eight You Are My Family Some of my hardest weeks, I smiled in person and hid the tears at home. And the people who showed up for me anyway? I told them the truest thing I know how to say: you are my family. Family isn't always blood — especially in our house. We let people in. And once you're in, you're stuck with us. There's a line I keep close: when they see you at your worst and still think you're the best — those are your people. They don't always know they're your people. So tell them. Family isn't always blood. Real Reminder™ They saw you at your worst and stayed. That's your people. Tell them so. Love hard. Love deep. ♡ — A C H A O S T O C O N T R O L C O . · I T T A K E S A V I L L A G E
Chapter Nine The Village That Was Then, Wasn't I've had villages that were real — and still ended. Years ago there was a community that had my back in that season. It's where I was built as a leader — the friendships, the training, the encouragement, the belief that I could actually move something. So much of what I pour into this work now started there. And then it faded with time. The village that was then, wasn't. For a long time that felt like loss. Now I see it differently: some villages are for a season — and what it gave me while it lasted is mine to keep. The village that was then, wasn't. Real Reminder™ A village can be real and still be temporary. What it gave you is yours to keep. Love hard. Love deep. ♡ — A C H A O S T O C O N T R O L C O . · I T T A K E S A V I L L A G E
Chapter Ten I Mattered Too It took a wake-up call for me to learn this. I'd spent so long pouring into everyone else that I'd quietly decided I came last. The day it clicked — that I mattered too, that a depleted mom can't pour from an empty cup — everything shifted. You never "find" time for yourself. You build it in on purpose. And part of building it is letting people in to hold some of the weight. You are not the last item on the list. You are the reason there's a list at all. I'm not the last thing on the list. I'm the reason there's a list. Real Reminder™ You're not the last thing on the list. You're the reason there's a list at all. Love hard. Love deep. ♡ — A C H A O S T O C O N T R O L C O . · I T T A K E S A V I L L A G E
P A R T F O U R · B U I L D I T B E F O R E Y O U N E E D I T Chapter Eleven Why the Village Exists The Village exists because real life isn't the highlight reel. We need someone to sit quietly with us when there are no words. Someone to let us vent without fixing it. Someone to laugh with about something stupid. Someone to run the errand. Someone to answer the phone. We need people who say "I've got you" — and mean it. We need people who say "I've got you." Real Reminder™ "I've got you" is a complete sentence. Say it. Mean it. Let someone say it to you. Love hard. Love deep. ♡ — A C H A O S T O C O N T R O L C O . · I T T A K E S A V I L L A G E
Chapter Twelve Out of Isolation Years ago I trained to become a facilitator and parent leader for a support group. I'll tell you exactly why. I saw so many families isolating — feeling alone, afraid to advocate, afraid of the judgment. I'd been there. Some days I'm still there. I once felt alone, really, really alone — surrounded by people. So I helped build something to bring families out of their isolation: to share their stories, to bond, to form the village they need and deserve. That's the whole reason this exists. Out of isolation, into each other. I felt alone, really alone — surrounded by people. Real Reminder™ I built the village I once needed. Out of isolation, into each other. Love hard. Love deep. ♡ — A C H A O S T O C O N T R O L C O . · I T T A K E S A V I L L A G E
Chapter Thirteen The Invitation If your list feels small right now, I see you. It's not because you're hard to love. It's because real life is a filter — and the ones still standing when the dust settles are your real village. And if it still feels too small? You can build a new one. Slowly. On purpose. Out of the people who get it. That's what The Village is. Not another thing to keep up with. A place to build relationships before you need them — where support looks like real life, and no one has to do this alone. I'm not looking for hundreds. I'm looking for thirteen women. Because no mom should have only one person. And no mom should have no one. Come as you are. We'll save you a seat. Real Reminder™ Come as you are. We'll save you a seat. Bring your chaos. You're welcome here. Love hard. Love deep. ♡ — A C H A O S T O C O N T R O L C O . · I T T A K E S A V I L L A G E
You don't have to do this alone. ↓ Love hard. Love deep. ♡ — ACome find your village — or be the one who saves a seat for the woman who's drowning. Either way, you're in.